On Being A Person and A Therapist
Our job is really unique.
As clinicians, I believe we often find ourselves in unique situations.
There are so many moments in our lives when we are carrying our own hard stories while holding space for and containing the stories of those sitting across from us.
If you’ve noticed my absence the past several weeks…. probably not, but I’m hopeful anyway…I have been in the trenches.
When I am in the trenches, the first thing to leave me is my capacity to create.
Will you sit with me for a moment in my trenches?
Early March I had planned to take half a week off for my college son’s spring break and woke up that Monday with the flu. It was not part of my plan that week to take the full week off resting in bed while my kiddo was home with us for the entire week.
What really pulled me deeper into the trenches though was grieving a loss on top of it. The day I woke up feeling the worst, I also learned of a significant loss in my family.
Have you ever been hit with grief and the flu at the same time?
I do not recommend it!!!!
While my body needed sleep, there was none to be had.
Throw a toddler into the mix as well and I imagine you can see where I’m going here.
Recovering in the trenches is hard.
I spent the week following trying to return to a sense of normalcy- work was all I could really muster the energy to do. Slowly though I found each day getting a little easier and thinking less frequently about what I was carrying.
One thing I kept coming back to was how hard it is as a clinician to have capacity for others when your body is feeling empty itself.
I spent those first 2 weeks talking to myself like I would my clients.
“It’s ok to feel like this is hard right now.”
“It’s ok to let the house go this week.”
“It’s ok to need rest.”
“It’s ok to think about it and feel.”
One thing I have tried so hard to be is transparent (to an extent) and practiced in what I am teaching. That last part is really hard!
How can we sit with those we are holding and tell them to feel if we are avoiding our own hard stories?
It’s a bit hypocritical and hard to understand the pain if we are not experiencing and sitting in our own pain.
I wonder how many of my fellow colleagues are neglecting their hard moments to have the capacity to do the intense work we do of holding others’ stories so tenderly.
If you find yourself struggling with this as well, then know you are not alone.
Are you looking for a space where you can be held while you grow as a clinician?
Being a clinician is a humbling and grace giving space to work within. We are carrying the weight of the world at times. We are holding some of the most fragile stories of others. We are also holding our own stories and hard experiences whilst living our own lives.
In my work with clinicians, I believe some of our most important work together is acknowledging the difficulty of holding both your story and that of your clients, of pouring into clinicians so they have the capacity to pour into their clients, of seeing the grief and gratitude of the work we do while also being human ourselves.
If you are seeking a space where you can learn to nurture yourself and grow in a way that teaches you to refill your own cup, instead of pouring into others until you are empty, then you are in the right space.
These are the types of conversations we unpack in my RPT Group Consultation and LPC Group Supervision and/or when you work with me one on one for individual supervision/consultation.
Our next RPT group meets Tuesday the 7th at 12pm cst. It’s not too late to sign up!
The next LPC group (for Tennessee residents) is March 16th from 12-2pm cst. (I have 1 slot remaining in this group).
If you are looking for individual work, reach out and let’s connect.
Let’s learn and grow together so you are not leaving sessions feeling depleted in your own life.
From my playroom to yours,
Dayna
P.S.
I am working on creating a cheat sheet with Play Therapy and EMDR specific treatment goals and objectives to help ease your treatment planning time. Let me know if this is something you would like by commenting below!