chores

My Kids Don’t Clean Up!

clutter-560701_640.jpg

Are You Raising Slobs?

I love when my house is clean and tidy.  It keeps me from feeling stressed and allows me to sit down without thinking about what I should be doing instead.

But, my family is not so concerned about how the house looks.  

It’s a constant warfare trying to get my kids to clean up their messes or pick up trash instead of step over it.  

So, for 2019, I’ve made it their personal goals to learn not to be a slob.  

Yep, this year will be the year they will learn to be more responsible and helpful.  

But guess what, they will not learn it overnight.  And, it’s going to take a lot of effort on my part.  Gasp…

However, it’s very important to me that when they are adults, their spouses do not question their slobbish tendencies.  Because guess what? That directly reflects on their parents. Yep! Guess whose responsibility it is to teach your kids how to keep things tidy and clean?  Yours!

The earlier you start the better!

But you also have to stay on top of it.  You cannot be lazy about this or they will be lazy.  Most kids are not naturally organized and tidy, unless you’ve  been working with them since they were able to clean up their first mess.  

So in the art of training, I have some tips for you.  

There is no right way to do this.  Pick what works for you and your family.  

There is a wrong way...not doing anything and just doing it all yourself.  

Here are a few things I’m going to start doing right now:

#1 They are responsible for clearing the table after supper.

washing-dishes-1112077_640.jpg

#2 The kids will alternate  washing dishes after supper while I supervise (for a little while) to ensure they are learning the correct way to do dishes.  

#3 I’m putting up signs throughout the house to remind them to :

  1. Empty the trash before it’s overflowing!

  2. Wash their dishes when they bring them to the sink!

  3. Wipe the toilet seat if they sprinkle it!

#4 I used to do this one and somehow stopped: instill a 10 minute tidy up daily before bedtime.  

#5 I also used to do this and quit (insert eyeroll): what gets left out, goes in a trash bag.  They can a) earn it back in 24 hours or b) it gets donated.

Here are some other tips from Focus on the Family.  I especially liked #1 and #6. I may import those into my plan too!  

And here are some ideas for keeping up with chores that I’ve pinned over the years!

Happy Training!!!

Dayna

P.S.

Do you also struggle with a family of slobs?  Let me know in the comments the 1 thing you want to teach your kids about tidyness.    


2 Major Changes in Parenting That We Struggle With

Sometimes life gets a little overwhelming, and you find yourself just going through the motions and losing enjoyment for things that used to matter.  This is called burnout.  People get burnout at work, which usually happens when you experience high stress over a long period of time with no breaks/vacation/self care days.  People feel burnout in school when they are struggling with a high load/stressful relationship/discouragement/many years of this on repeat.

Today I'm talking about burnout at home, which looks a lot like burnout at work.  You find yourself going through the motions of preparing meals, laundry, cleaning, helping with homework, sickness, driving kids from place to place, cleaning, laundry, cleaning, laundry....You see where I'm going with this?  As parents, it can get overwhelming and just TIRING.  At some point, you find yourself hating all the mundane tasks, thinking negatively about everyone who is not pitching in on the to do list, and ready to just throw in the towel.

2 things have changed in our parenting society.

1 . Moms are still the main caretaker- Moms work full time jobs and lots of times are doing the majority of the work with taking care of the house and children.  (I know there are some families who share-rare, and I know there are families where roles are reversed.)

2. Parents are not teaching there Kids to help out at all!

Why do we continue to live like this?  The stress is unreal.  Moms (just replace with dad if you must) get labeled as "drill sergeant", "nagging", "always in a bad mood", "no fun", "buzz killers".  You know the answer to our problem lies in our homes.  It's right there within your reach.  Family!  It's time for parents to regroup and put your family to use.  Moms-you are not the only ones who can fold laundry, scrub toilets, or run a vacuum.  Divvy up the to do list.

This not only takes the stress of bearing all these responsibilities off of one person, but it teaches everyone else responsibility.  If you want mom to have more energy/time for fun/playful attitudes, help her out.  It's exhausting to come home from a long day of working or grocery shopping+running errands+transporting kids to appointments or practices and know you still have to cook, clean up, do homework, make sure baths are done, wash/dry/fold/put away laundry..... before you can fall in bed.  Let's hand out some of these jobs to our loving family members and remember that it's teaching them responsibility.  Take the time you would be spending doing chores and spend some real quality time with your family.

Give your kids a chore today and ask your spouse for some help with 1 item on your list, then tell me how it went by leaving a comment below.